Friday, November 19, 2004

She Kissed a Girl, She Saw a Cop, She Got Booed

There’s a good article on Jill Sobule in the latest issue of No Depression magazine. Her latest cd is Underdog Victorious.

A couple quotes…

On a new song, “I Saw a Cop”:

“Wouldn’t it make a great video? But we need to get someone famous to play the cop. Let me think about that one. Teresa Heinz Kerry! That’d be awesome! There’s something kind of old-time sexy about her; she’s got that Marlene thing going.”

On getting booed as an opening act for Don Henley:

“Maybe ‘cause the t-shirt I had on said ‘My Bush Would Make a Better President’…

Tuesday, November 16, 2004

Dumbass Hunters

The War On Wildlife continues…

There are only about two hundred whooping cranes left in the world. Dumbass hunters in Kansas just shot one percent of the entire population.

“Seven Kansas hunters have admitted to last weekend's shooting of two endangered whooping cranes in Stafford County, a U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service agent said Wednesday.

One of the cranes died Wednesday morning at Kansas State University's veterinary hospital. The other is recovering from a broken wing and several body wounds.”

And Defenders of Wildlife has this appalling story from Alaska:

“The anti-conservation Board of Game has just voted to allow up to 900 wolves to be killed by the barbaric practice of aerial gunning. This is six times as many as were killed last winter.

Easy targets against fallen snow, wolves can be gunned down from airplanes or chased to exhaustion, then shot at point blank range.”

But once in a while, the wildlife does win a small battle .

“NORTH VERNON, Ind. - When hunter Jim Mick went into the woods to bag himself a deer, he never expected to come out empty-handed — and badly bruised.

The 69-year-old bowhunter was treated for injuries he said he suffered during a wrestling match with an angry buck. Mick, of North Vernon, said the deer attacked him Monday while he was hunting alone in rural Decatur County in southeastern Indiana.

"He came out of the tall grass and briars," said Mick. "When I realized it, he was on me already."

Mick said the animal, which weighed about 150 pounds, struck him in the chest and knocked him to the ground, goring him in the thigh. "All I had time to do was throw my hands up and grab his antlers," he said.

After about a 10-minute struggle, Mick said he managed to put a tree between himself and the deer, and the animal retreated.”

Wednesday, November 10, 2004

Another Bird of the Week -- Great Horned Owl

With the time change, it’s just about dark when I leave the office out here in Geneva, Illinois. We’re right by the Fox River, and the area still has plenty of forest.

Last night, as I was leaving, I could see two owls together in a tree north of our parking lot. I could not identify them by sight, but they were hooting, the both of them, and they sounded exactly like this recording of great horned owls.

Purple People Meters

Lots of post-election maps…

The pretty purple one at boingboing.

Wonkette has the striped one .

These guys have red, blue and purple in various shapes.

And I found the free vs. slave state map at miscellaneous meanderings.

11/11 update --
Another map, one with big blue towers.

Tuesday, November 09, 2004

Bird of the Week -- Red-Breasted Nuthatch

We have seen an occasional white-breasted nuthatch at the feeders out back, and the other day we saw a female red-breasted nuthatch.

Anne McCue

Saw Anne McCue open for Dave Alvin this past weekend at Chicago’s Old Town School of Folk Music. Her new album, from which she played several good songs, is Roll.

Amazon has free downloads of a few songs from a previous record:

"Walking Devotion"

"My Only One"


She opened her set with a great line, and excuse my attempt to reproduce her charming Australian accent:

“It’s noice to be heah in the blue stite of Illinois.”

Lost In the White House

Someone reminded me of my favorite joke of the year, which I've updated a bit...

So there's this big post-election party at the White House. All the big contributors are there, hootin-and-a-hollerin'.

One guy has a few drinks, and wanders off to find the men's room. He gets lost, walks around a while, and finally opens a door to what he hopes is the men's room.

Instead, he finds Bush and Cheney in a conference room, standing by a big table that's full of maps and charts.

He apologizes profusely, and turns to go. "That's alright, citizen," says Bush. "No apology needed."

"Thank you, Mister President," says the guy. "And may I say, what an honor it is to meet you and the Vice President, and thank you for all you've done to the country."

Bush and Cheney nod and smile, and continue looking at their maps and charts.

The guy summons up his courage and says, "May I ask you, sirs, what you have planned next?"

Bush replies, "Well, citizen, there's going to be a big offensive. It's going to kill another hundred thousand Iraqis and Oprah Winfrey."

"Oprah?" the guy asks. "Why Oprah?"

Cheney laughs and slaps Bush on the back. "See, I told you -- no one cares about a hundred thousand Iraqis!"

Monday, November 08, 2004

Shrub and Satan

Al Franken explores the shocking story of the Bush-Satan Connection.

The Only Band That Mattered, Except to ABC

So ABC has two new hit tv shows this season, Desperate Housewives and Lost. I watch them both, and they’re quite good.

They’ll probably be pulling in piles of money from the advertisers. So maybe someone there didn’t have to be such a dick about some video from twenty-four years ago...

I was reading in Harp magazine about the new re-release of London Calling by The Clash. There’s the original album, a bonus disc of outtakes and rehearsals, and a dvd with videos and a documentary. They were also hoping to include the band’s legendary 1980 appearance on Fridays, on ABC-TV. But the aforementioned dicks at ABC allegedly demanded too much money for the footage.

Friday, November 05, 2004

Post Election Joke #2

An example of the kind of jokes going around The Other Side...

We at Carnival Cruise Lines: didn't forget that a lot of entertainers had promised to leave the country if George W.Bush were to be re-elected President.

With that in mind, we have a Special Offer for those who still want to keep their promise!

Attention: Would Alec Baldwin, Rosie O'Donnell and her wife, Ed Asner, Janeane Garafalo, Whoppi Goldberg, Al Franken, Michael Moore, Cher, Phil Donahue, Rob Reiner(apparently still a "meathead"), Barbara Streisand, Jane Fonda, Pierre Salinger, as well as the entire staffs of the LA and NY Times and anyone else who made that promise, please dispose of all US assets and report to Florida for the sailing of the Funship Cruise, "Elation," which has been commissioned to take you to your new vacation homes in Afghanistan.

You may opt to be dropped off in Somalia or Iraq.

The Florida Supreme Court will sponsor a Farewell Parade in your honor through Palm Beach, Broward, and Miami-Dade counties prior to your cruise.

Please pack for an extended stay... at least four more years.

Note: Since you advocate strict gun control, you may not bring any.

Staffing your voyage is Bill Clinton as captain, Al Gore as cruise director, Grey Davis, Purser Terry Heinz Kerry hopefully will be kept somewhere below decks away from the media.

Monica Lewinsky as the "Cigar and Cigarette Girl",

Entertainment by the Dixie Chicks and Bruce Springsteen, John Kerry will be our Life Guard in consideration of his past experience in pulling people out of the water. (Unless he decides at the last minute not to go) He is advocating the ellimination of the game "shuffleboard" in favor of his new game he calls "waffleboard" Be sure to pack your flip flops as you will need them! while playing.

Ted Kennedy will double as Bartender and Director of Emergency Procedures

If you have any questions about making arrangements for your homes,friends and loved ones, please direct your comments to Senator Hillary Clinton. Her village can raise your children while you're gone, and she can watch over all your money and your furnishings until you return.

"Bon Voyage!"

Post Election Joke #1

While walking down the street one day, a Republican head of state is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.

"Welcome to Heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in." says the Republican.

"Well, I'd like to but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in Hell and one in Heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."

"Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in Heaven," says the Republican head of state.

"I'm sorry but we have our rules." And with that, St. Peter escorts the Republican to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to Hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a club and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him, everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, hug him, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at expense of the people. They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster and caviar. Also present is the Devil (a Republican, too), who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes.

They are having such a good time that, before he realizes it, it is time to go. Everyone gives him a big hug and waves while the elevator rises. The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on Heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him.

"Now it's time to visit Heaven." So 24 hours pass with the Republican head of state joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.

"Well then, you've spent a day in Hell and another in Heaven. Now choose your eternity."

He reflects for a minute, then the head of state answers: "Well, I would never have thought it, I mean Heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in Hell."

So Saint Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to Hell. Now the doors of the elevator open and he is in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags. The Devil comes over to the Republican and lays an arm on his neck.

"I don't understand," stammers the Republican head of state. Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and club and we ate lobster and caviar and danced and had a great time. Now all there is a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable."

The Devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning. Today you voted for us!"

Thursday, November 04, 2004

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

Kelly Hogan's Father

This was posted to several mailing lists. Kelly Hogan is a Chicago based singer.

From KELLY HOGAN--posted elsewhere:

Hello friends and family --

First off, I apologize for this mass e-mail.

As many of y'all know, after being called up out of National Guard reserves two years ago, my dad (career policeman, age 59, flew helicopters in Viet Nam) is about to be shipped to Iraq in the next few weeks to lead convoys in the desert for Apache warbird "Flying Tigers" Aviation Regiment 8-229th.

It's very hard for me to talk about this issue, and I'm still figuring out how to deal with all the levels of bullshit involved. I also have other friends in Iraq already and I'm sure many of y'all do too.

I feel funny sharing this personal information, and my goal is certainly *not* sympathetic feedback of *any* kind -- but rather to pass along a screwed-up fact to add to the pile -- to increase awareness of the current situation.

I just finished reading an interview with Stan Goff (24-year military vet, Bring Them Home Now campaign, Military Families Speak Out, Veterans for Peace) in the new issue of The Sun magazine -- and I wanted to pass along two links for y'all:

I know there are many sides of the issue. These are just two more that I felt compelled to share.

Thanks for your time.


Four More Years, Ka-Ching

At least Wall Street is happy.

The Day After

Well, umm, I went back to Ohio and the election was gone...